Training vs Mentoring vs Coaching
Why the Difference Matters
Pop quiz for you: What’s the difference between coaching, mentoring, and training?
No, it’s not a trick question!
There really is a difference, and all three factor into a coach-like approach to leadership.
What’s important is knowing HOW to identify each leadership mode and WHEN to use each one. Because they each have their time and place…and you’ll see why by the time you get to the end of this article.
Coach-Like Leadership: The 3 Leadership Modes
I once had a client who signed on to work with me because he wanted to be a more coach-like leader. But he was getting all sorts of mixed messages about coaching.
He told me, “I’m trying to coach my direct reports, but it’s not working. They aren’t engaged and I think they’re barely even listening!”
After talking with him for a little bit, I realized he was confusing these three leadership modes.
Most of the “coaching” he had both experienced and provided to others wasn’t really coaching. It was actually training, mentoring, and a bit of cheerleading wrapped up under the label of coaching.
Don’t get me wrong. Training and mentoring are both fantastic, especially when you either need to teach or guide your team. But coaching is used when you want to empower and challenge your team to take ownership and use their own judgment.
As a general rule of thumb…
Training mode = “Here’s how you should do this.”
Mentoring mode = “Here’s how I would do this if I were you.”
Coaching mode = “How do you think you should do this?”
Can you see what a huge difference this makes?
What I explained to my client is this. If you’re doing most of the talking and your teammate is simply nodding as they listen, you’re probably not in coaching mode.
Once we sorted out the three leadership modes and how to use them, my client was shocked to see the level of enthusiasm skyrocket throughout his team.
Putting It Into Practice
Coach-like leadership doesn’t require that you use coaching mode exclusively. Coach-like leaders weave coaching, mentoring, and training together, always asking themselves, “What’s needed now?”
This week, take the time to ask yourself that exact question and think about when you should be using each of the three modes.
You can use this as a reference guide:
- Training is best used when the desired outcome is clear and the steps to get there are predetermined. Learning a new software system would likely require training. Mastering the specific, required steps to complete a project could be a great opportunity for training.
- Mentoring is great for a situation where your experience and advice can be helpful to your team. You can walk them through how you would approach the problem, but still leave space for them to make their own choices and judgement calls.
- Coaching is ideal when you are trying to develop the wisdom or expertise that your team member has…but maybe doesn’t recognize yet. When you’re coaching you are not teaching; instead you are trying to draw out the hidden potential that is already there. Coaching is highly question-based! Your job is to ask questions that help your team members deepen their understanding and gain confidence.
Most leaders tend to excel at one or two of these modes, but have to put in some effort to master all three.
For example, you might be excellent at training…but your team members are frustrated because they feel confined to your methods, without having any space to develop their own processes.
Or you might be excellent at coaching…but your team members are always confused on their tasks, because they feel like they never get trained properly.
Mentoring is sort of the middle ground, but it still requires a great deal of self-awareness to know when to go heavier on the training or when to go heavier on the coaching.
As a fun exercise, reply to this post and rank the three modes in the order of what comes most naturally to you. Which mode is your strongest? Which is your weakest? Do you now have a clearer idea of what you can focus on with your team?