Turn Your Day Around

The Smile File for When You’re Down

There’s something I’ve noticed about high-achievers that doesn’t quite seem fair.

Often, they see “losses” as personal failures. But they see “wins” as just part of the job and nothing more. 

Have you noticed the same thing? (Maybe even in yourself?)

It’s a little bit like an A student getting an A+ on a quiz. To the other students, that may seem like an incredible achievement. But to the A student, it’s just another day at school. No big deal.

My clients at all levels can easily recount their biggest failures, but often struggle to celebrate their wins.

Why is this?

Well, high-achievers tend to have high standards and expectations for themselves. So what other people see as a “win,” a high-achiever might only see as the “standard” or maybe even the “bare minimum.” 

But, you know what I’ve realized?

High-achiever or not, we all need a pick-me-up sometimes. We all have days where we just want to hear that we made a difference.

And that’s why I’ve started encouraging my clients to create a Smile File. I think you’ll like it too ☺️

A Smile File: My Way of Celebrating Wins

Remember my mango tree? Over my past few posts, I’ve shared the story of how a limb full of fruit broke off my mango tree, but ended up being an unexpected gift. 

I received several beautiful comments and replies to the story from people who loved the reframe and appreciated how we can view challenging events from a different perspective.

Those comments went straight into my Smile File.

But first…what is a Smile File?

➡️ It’s a personal collection of reminders that you are making a difference.

It’s where I put any and all affirming messages as they come my way. If you send me something nice or leave a comment…it’s probably going into my Smile File.

This is where I go when I’m feeling low or lacking motivation. When I need a little pick-me-up, I open my Smile File and read all of the encouraging notes I’ve saved that remind me, It’s all worth it.

Battling the Biggest Enemy: Your Inner Critic

For many of us, we are our own worst critics.

We hold ourselves to a high standard, and the dedication is visible in our work. But it also makes us dangerously vulnerable to burnout.

When you keep pushing forward without pausing to recognize your wins, you miss out on the dopamine hit of celebrating success. At the same time, you’re under the influence of negativity bias: the cognitive bias that leads us to dwell on negative events more than positive.

Minimizing wins + maximizing losses = a recipe for burnout.

It’s such an easy trap to fall into. I’ve met with many clients who felt like they weren’t doing enough, when the people around them would likely say the opposite!

So when that inner critic comes creeping forward, the Smile File is a way to remind ourselves of who we really are. It’s a way to offset the negativity bias. To remind ourselves why we do what we do, and how we’re making an impact in the world.

Putting It Into Practice: Build a Smile File

Start today by setting up a folder for your Smile File collection. I prefer a digital system, but a physical folder could be a great solution, depending on your preferences. The most important thing is that you actually use the Smile File to collect and then refer to these reminders when you need a pick-me-up.

When your boss sends an email letting you know you did a great job on your presentation, that goes into the Smile File. When your kid leaves a post-it note thanking you for driving her and her friends all over town, snap a photo and drop it into the Smile File. When your client leaves a voicemail expressing his gratitude for your extra-mile efforts, jot down the key sentences and stash it in the Smile File.

Someday down the road, when you’re having a tough day, open your Smile File and let all these little notes put a smile back on your face.