There seems to be lots of confusion about the differences between training, mentoring and coaching. I see leaders claiming that they are “coaching” their team when they are training or mentoring. Using a coach approach can make a huge difference in a team’s engagement and results, so it’s important to recognize when you are actually coaching. I’ve come up with three simple phrases to help you identify which mode you are in at any time.
Training is highly directive. It’s useful when you need to teach a specific process, procedure or system. It doesn’t allow much room for creativity. The key phrase for training is, “This is how I want you to do it.”
By mentoring, I mean helping someone excel in their current position. It’s offering your advice or opinion to guide another. If that other person is open and capable of hearing your advice, mentoring can be a great short-cut to getting at the needed results. The phrase for mentoring is, “This is how I would do it if I were you.”
With a coach approach, you’re helping another person find and implement their own best solution. It is an excellent way to engage a team member and bring out their creative genius. With coaching, the phrase is, “What do YOU think is the best way to do it?”
The two directive approaches, training and mentoring, are easy traps for any leader to fall into. It may be faster and easier in the short run to just tell someone how to do something. Even mentoring, which sounds like a suggestion, usually carries an unspoken message that tells the other person you expect them to do it your way.
When a leader relies too heavily on training and mentoring, the team becomes dependent on the leader. They take less initiative and show less creativity. They are less engaged. They get the message that it’s not okay to make mistakes, which is an innovation killer.
Taking a coach approach may take more time, especially at first when you are learning and practicing how to do it well. I promise that the payoff is huge in the long run. So start paying attention. Start asking yourself which approach you are taking in any moment. The simple process of noticing and naming your approach will start to shift your behaviors.
Check out this short video on the topic and let me know what you think. What do YOU think is the best way to incorporate a coach approach into your leadership toolbox?